Matthew 6:26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?
I have read this verse before, written about this verse and lived out this verse. I know this verse and the meaning it holds in my life.
I knew all week Friday was coming, it was inevitable. I knew that Friday would hold a $1700 hole that I could not fill, I knew that on Fridy I needed to withdraw funds for tithing. I knew my insurance nightmare had become an even greater mess.
I didn't waiver on the tithe. But I will say it didn't make sense. But guess what? Out of all the money owed on my list, that was at least achievable. I found that to be positive. However the nagging thought followed of all the bills that wouldn't be paid and would create great problems.
I know that God can anything. But I didn't see how this could fulfilled. I also knew I or we had created this mess, though I'm still not sure how, so maybe it makes sense for God to let me feel the effects of the consequences.
Honestly, I didn't know. I hadn't been worried or fixated on this throughout the week, but it did pass through my mind from time to time. But I alwasy reasoned that if it wasn't pay day then the problem wasn't on my plate for the day.
But today is Friday, it is payday.
First I figured out the priorities. UGH there was $222 to pay $1700 worth of bills and celebrate Alex's birthday. Then a math error and I have another $360. Then an idea pops in about stock sale, call to Jeff and by 11am we have $1816 for bills.
God has everything under His control. everything means EVERYTHING! My humaness doesn't allow for me to understand or predict God. I don't need to. I simply need to trust that He has EVERYTHING under control. I only need to follow Him daily where He leads, spend time with Him daily so that I will know His voice and guidance and above all trust Him.
I guess that I forgot again the magnitude that everything means EVERYTHING. He has me. I need to trust and follow. Be free to allow Him to work through me to reach others every minute of every day and not get sidetracked with details that I clearly can't care for anyway.
Just look at how He cares and provides for the birds. Thank You Father for the reminder. Thank You for caring for me and for continuing grow my faith through perfectly experiencing You. Father, bless the time I have with Alex today. Father fill this time with love, laughter and joy as we celebrate her life. Father cover the game tonight with Your protection. Guide the students in attendance, grant them life and safety. Father give me peace. Into Your hands I place them all that Your will might prevail. In Christ, Amen.
Friday, October 12, 2012
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Learn from Me
My body woke me up at 2:24 for a quick trip to the bathroom.
Once I laid back down, I was awake. I acknowledged the presence of Christ and sensed He was inviting me to spend time with Him.
I wanted to, I was trying to, but Satan obviously was against this idea. First I couldn't concentrate because the train whistle distracted me. Then my half of my nose clogged and breathing or lack of breathing was distracting. I couldn't get comfortable... you name it and quiet time with my Savior just wasn't happening.
The longer I laid there, the more my heart and mind felt burdened. I knew that in order to meet with Jesus for some much needed one-on-one time, I would need to move myself from the present surroundings.
I grabbed a Hall's cough drop and I trotted myself to the downstairs couch.
It was freezing! I easily found 2 blankets and a pillow. I got all comfy and cozy and Jesus was right there waiting! But as much as I wanted to spend time with Him, I couldn't settle down the busy-ness in my head.
So, I just quietly laid there.
Come to find out I had an awful lot on my mind. My brain was racing! I was concerned for Jeff's sister & her family, I was distraught over finances and tithing, I was concerned for my earlier conversation with Andie, Alex's birthday is on a Wednesday and so is Survivor night with Laura & Joseph, and another college visit on a Wednesday in 2 weeks.
It was a serious battle. All of these issues kept swirling and swirling around in my head. They were such a mountain of distraction & noise that I could barely see Jesus and there was NO hearing from Him.
So I just laid there some more.
I was frustrated. I knew I needed time with Jesus, but the noise in my head sounded too loud, the mountain of issues in front of me seemed to great.
The longer I laid there, the quieter the noise became.
First up was Jeff's sister's family. Jesus reminded me He had already instructed me on this a few days ago. Why was I attempting to pick it up again? After several minutes I remember the Serenity Prayer. Yes, I remember, for now this is something I cannot change. I prayed for peace to settle this storm for now.
Then came finances and tithing. This was a giant pickle! I knew it, how could Christ fix this? I just sat with my turmoil and finally I simply heard, rested on the thought that "this is not for today." It's true, payday is not until Friday, worrying today will not help only deter the day's mission. Wow.
Conversation with Andie? Well that held the issue to really dive into. Yesterday afternoon God got me thinking about the Grace He offers to me every day. The challenge was strive to exemplify that same grace to those around me beginning with getting out of the car and walking into the house.
First I had a misunderstanding with Alex about dirty dishes that weren't hers, then a frustrating exchange with Andie and a short-tempered response to Jeff.... UGH this was all within 10 or 15 minutes of walking in the door.
Can you say "F-A-I-L?" Wow, miserably!! Now I had compounded the situation with guilt. Oh to be human!
I had failed in the moment. However, now at 330 in the morning, I was also aware and working through this with Jesus. What kept popping into my head was parts of yesterdays devotional verse in Matthew 11:28-30...."learn from me." I was in the perfect place for Him to teach and for me to learn.
I have a new perspective.
Then another phrase from yesterday's verse emerged....."for I am gentle and humble at heart." I definitely was not this! Oh dear. But I want to be.
Shortly thereafter I must have fallen asleep, because I awoke at 530am.
I am walking through today changed as a result of last night. Today I am more gentle and humble at heart. A long way from where I am sure God desires me to be, but I am more in Him than I was yesterday. Not because in the middle of the night He removed my burdens and made my world perfect. He didn't, not technically anyway.
I am more in Him because I spent time with Him, learning from Him and growing in relationship with Him. It's very good. I want to continue to learn from Him and grow in Him. I am thankful for my time with Him last night.
Once I laid back down, I was awake. I acknowledged the presence of Christ and sensed He was inviting me to spend time with Him.
I wanted to, I was trying to, but Satan obviously was against this idea. First I couldn't concentrate because the train whistle distracted me. Then my half of my nose clogged and breathing or lack of breathing was distracting. I couldn't get comfortable... you name it and quiet time with my Savior just wasn't happening.
The longer I laid there, the more my heart and mind felt burdened. I knew that in order to meet with Jesus for some much needed one-on-one time, I would need to move myself from the present surroundings.
I grabbed a Hall's cough drop and I trotted myself to the downstairs couch.
It was freezing! I easily found 2 blankets and a pillow. I got all comfy and cozy and Jesus was right there waiting! But as much as I wanted to spend time with Him, I couldn't settle down the busy-ness in my head.
So, I just quietly laid there.
Come to find out I had an awful lot on my mind. My brain was racing! I was concerned for Jeff's sister & her family, I was distraught over finances and tithing, I was concerned for my earlier conversation with Andie, Alex's birthday is on a Wednesday and so is Survivor night with Laura & Joseph, and another college visit on a Wednesday in 2 weeks.
It was a serious battle. All of these issues kept swirling and swirling around in my head. They were such a mountain of distraction & noise that I could barely see Jesus and there was NO hearing from Him.
So I just laid there some more.
I was frustrated. I knew I needed time with Jesus, but the noise in my head sounded too loud, the mountain of issues in front of me seemed to great.
The longer I laid there, the quieter the noise became.
First up was Jeff's sister's family. Jesus reminded me He had already instructed me on this a few days ago. Why was I attempting to pick it up again? After several minutes I remember the Serenity Prayer. Yes, I remember, for now this is something I cannot change. I prayed for peace to settle this storm for now.
Then came finances and tithing. This was a giant pickle! I knew it, how could Christ fix this? I just sat with my turmoil and finally I simply heard, rested on the thought that "this is not for today." It's true, payday is not until Friday, worrying today will not help only deter the day's mission. Wow.
Conversation with Andie? Well that held the issue to really dive into. Yesterday afternoon God got me thinking about the Grace He offers to me every day. The challenge was strive to exemplify that same grace to those around me beginning with getting out of the car and walking into the house.
First I had a misunderstanding with Alex about dirty dishes that weren't hers, then a frustrating exchange with Andie and a short-tempered response to Jeff.... UGH this was all within 10 or 15 minutes of walking in the door.
Can you say "F-A-I-L?" Wow, miserably!! Now I had compounded the situation with guilt. Oh to be human!
I had failed in the moment. However, now at 330 in the morning, I was also aware and working through this with Jesus. What kept popping into my head was parts of yesterdays devotional verse in Matthew 11:28-30...."learn from me." I was in the perfect place for Him to teach and for me to learn.
I have a new perspective.
Then another phrase from yesterday's verse emerged....."for I am gentle and humble at heart." I definitely was not this! Oh dear. But I want to be.
Shortly thereafter I must have fallen asleep, because I awoke at 530am.
I am walking through today changed as a result of last night. Today I am more gentle and humble at heart. A long way from where I am sure God desires me to be, but I am more in Him than I was yesterday. Not because in the middle of the night He removed my burdens and made my world perfect. He didn't, not technically anyway.
I am more in Him because I spent time with Him, learning from Him and growing in relationship with Him. It's very good. I want to continue to learn from Him and grow in Him. I am thankful for my time with Him last night.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Burdened
Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Last week was an interesting week. Starting with the prior Sunday, the tithing commitment that God asked for and I submitted to.
At the moment He asked, I didn't really think through the ramifications of all that would lie ahead. I knew only at that moment God was asking something from me. Having been down this road before I knew I wanted to follow. I knew I didn't want to be anywhere that God wasn't. So I took His hand and committed to financial tithing in the next pay period which would be October 12.
Last week could have been a financial disaster but as I followed God, He provided.
Looking back at last week, I believe God fully knew what I had committed to and that today, I would realize the impossibility of that commitment. God knew I would need the experiences with Him last week to help anchor me in Him.
I didn't see it then, but I see it now. As I have reviewed the finances for the approaching pay period I see there is no way to meet the financial obligation that exists without tithing. Add tithing in and it's beyond achievable. Although I suppose impossible is just impossible. Even $1.00 needed beyond what is in hand at any given moment is no more or no less impossible.
The verse above showed up in my Saturday quiet time devotion. I knew when I read it that it somehow pertained to last week and the week ahead, but I didn't have time to think about it. It kept coming back to me over the course of Saturday and Sunday.
And now here I am.
I think I usually read that first verse and miss the word burdened. I see the words "come," "weary," and "rest." Today, "weary" tried to overshadow again, but "burdened" battled to the forefront.
Today I read: Come to me, all who are burdened, and I will give you rest. Learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
What is so wonderful about this verse as I see it today? It speaks perfectly to where I am and what I need to focus on.
I am feeling the financial burden. I see the financial impossibility of our situation and even still He promises rest for my soul. He is gentle, humble in heart and desires for me to learn from Him.
God created me, He knows me. He knows how I struggle to hold on to control even as everything is falling apart. Crazy, I know. Then last night Jeff and I had a random conversation that provided additional unrest regarding the stability of our financial future. Unfortunately this fueled my "desire-to-control" fire.
As I reviewed the next pay periods activity and saw the mountain in front of me, Matthew 11:28-30 popped back up.
I must walk away from all that binds. I must leave this burden with Him. To do so I need Him. Only Him and none of me. My heart must be transformed and trust Him.
Father , Christ says to "learn from Him." I desperately want to learn. Open my mind and my heart to Your teaching. I desire a pure heart, not a burdened heart. Father I know I cannot do this without You. In fact I cannot do this at all. I must surrender completely before You. Father this is Yours, but somehow I have made a mess of it. Father I don't ask You to clean this up because I made a mess. I come before You seeking a change of heart. Change me Father. Make me, mold me, I am Yours. Guide us into each decision. Father, I lay my life before Your throne, I ask for the Holy Spirit to fill me and guide me. Father I desire for You have complete control, that I may have the peace that accompanies. Father I don't know what to do so just as I give You all of me, I also give You Your monies. I pray for Your Wisdom and Your peace. Father I pray for Your strength and courage to follow as You guide, to grow in trust in perfect plan as Friday approaches. Father in You I take refuge and in You I trust. Father I am sorry for inexcusable disaster. Father I ask You to lead me. I want to grow in trust. Help me Father. Amen.
Last week was an interesting week. Starting with the prior Sunday, the tithing commitment that God asked for and I submitted to.
At the moment He asked, I didn't really think through the ramifications of all that would lie ahead. I knew only at that moment God was asking something from me. Having been down this road before I knew I wanted to follow. I knew I didn't want to be anywhere that God wasn't. So I took His hand and committed to financial tithing in the next pay period which would be October 12.
Last week could have been a financial disaster but as I followed God, He provided.
Looking back at last week, I believe God fully knew what I had committed to and that today, I would realize the impossibility of that commitment. God knew I would need the experiences with Him last week to help anchor me in Him.
I didn't see it then, but I see it now. As I have reviewed the finances for the approaching pay period I see there is no way to meet the financial obligation that exists without tithing. Add tithing in and it's beyond achievable. Although I suppose impossible is just impossible. Even $1.00 needed beyond what is in hand at any given moment is no more or no less impossible.
The verse above showed up in my Saturday quiet time devotion. I knew when I read it that it somehow pertained to last week and the week ahead, but I didn't have time to think about it. It kept coming back to me over the course of Saturday and Sunday.
And now here I am.
I think I usually read that first verse and miss the word burdened. I see the words "come," "weary," and "rest." Today, "weary" tried to overshadow again, but "burdened" battled to the forefront.
Today I read: Come to me, all who are burdened, and I will give you rest. Learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
What is so wonderful about this verse as I see it today? It speaks perfectly to where I am and what I need to focus on.
I am feeling the financial burden. I see the financial impossibility of our situation and even still He promises rest for my soul. He is gentle, humble in heart and desires for me to learn from Him.
God created me, He knows me. He knows how I struggle to hold on to control even as everything is falling apart. Crazy, I know. Then last night Jeff and I had a random conversation that provided additional unrest regarding the stability of our financial future. Unfortunately this fueled my "desire-to-control" fire.
As I reviewed the next pay periods activity and saw the mountain in front of me, Matthew 11:28-30 popped back up.
I must walk away from all that binds. I must leave this burden with Him. To do so I need Him. Only Him and none of me. My heart must be transformed and trust Him.
Father , Christ says to "learn from Him." I desperately want to learn. Open my mind and my heart to Your teaching. I desire a pure heart, not a burdened heart. Father I know I cannot do this without You. In fact I cannot do this at all. I must surrender completely before You. Father this is Yours, but somehow I have made a mess of it. Father I don't ask You to clean this up because I made a mess. I come before You seeking a change of heart. Change me Father. Make me, mold me, I am Yours. Guide us into each decision. Father, I lay my life before Your throne, I ask for the Holy Spirit to fill me and guide me. Father I desire for You have complete control, that I may have the peace that accompanies. Father I don't know what to do so just as I give You all of me, I also give You Your monies. I pray for Your Wisdom and Your peace. Father I pray for Your strength and courage to follow as You guide, to grow in trust in perfect plan as Friday approaches. Father in You I take refuge and in You I trust. Father I am sorry for inexcusable disaster. Father I ask You to lead me. I want to grow in trust. Help me Father. Amen.
Friday, October 5, 2012
State of Heart
Oh where to begin?
The last six days have been a transformational culmination of the Spirit guiding me, speaking to my heart, asking me to change. This has been a process that began in July. I love when I grow in faith through obedience.
An obedient life with Christ is definitely an adventure and one which is full of growth opportunities, ever transforming. I love this life, but that doesn't always mean it's easy.
Back in July I realized I had moved in my daily relationship with Christ. I could see God using the daily devotion time with Cassie to draw me nearer to Him, then in August a spark fueled a fire when we followed God to visit Trader's Point Christian Church and the end of September daily devotion time with my husband was restored providing a wonderful time for us to share and grow together.
With each new encounter God has been moving in my heart.
Throughout all this growth, I knew I was holding onto a mess, a money mess. I kept having an uncomfortable feeling regarding our finances. I knew we were stretched too thin, we had too many obligations and I knew weren't tithing. I know this sounds very disobediently nuts, very sin-filled, you name it. Trust me I know! But still this is the truth of where I was and I didn't know where to begin to make changes. The mess seemed barely manageable with no room to give. I was holding on tight to a sinking ship. So I just lived with the voice of the Spirit reminding me of my disobedience and that I needed to change.
Not fun, but it's what I did.
Then six days ago, without knowing how disastrous our finances were about to become God spoke loud and clear.
We stayed home that Sunday to have Church as a family through the online streaming at Maryland Community Church. We have never done this, but it felt like that was where God wanted us that morning. It was a bit chaotic with grand-babies playing, technology malfunctions and breakfast.... but it was family, it was good and God was among us.
Honestly, with the atomosphere that was surrounding us, I didn't expect to receive any message that morning..... however, when God wants to speak to you, it really doesn't matter what's going on around you, somehow He takes center stage and He is all you will hear.
The message was on tithing. I wanted to pretend the sermon didn't hold a message for me. But the sermon went on and on until I heard. By the end I accepted God's invitation to turn the finances over to Him. I committed to the plan He laid before me.
My head knew this plan made no sense. This plan was not feasible nor possible from where I was sitting.
But my heart knew this was God's plan, He rarely works within the finite views of this world, and it was for God to sort out. This was for Him to manage, for me to follow and trust.
My head wanted to freak out, but instantaneously my heart's peace overruled! I do remember this whole exchange seemed bigger than I was understanding, but I was following Him and that's all I was holding onto.
Now to the days that followed. We experienced bizarre banking issues, one example is I overpaid Andie's lunch account by 3x the amount, I have never done this in four years! And there were more unexpected transactions that followed. By all rights our bank accounts should have been negative and absorbed 100's of dollars of fees. However, with God in control, He carefully orchestrated timing and dollars were always available for me to transfer. Nothing short of miraculous, we encountered no fees and I watched this week's banking with wide-eyed amazement.
Then came Thursday. We had a bill that absolutely had to be paid by 5pm Thursday or an even bigger mess would result. I thought the bill was $325. We tried all week to find a solution to help reduce the amount. I went to some quite extensive lengths trying to help God out. Then on Thursday when we couldn't find an alternative I called to verify the amount. OH NO!! The amount due is $711. Looks like God doesn't need our help after all, we needed His more than we knew!
If we didn't have the $325 then you can only imagine the impact of more than double that amount.
My eyes were immediately opened. I could see how God had moved three weeks ago knowing this day would come, I could see Him even more clearly through His message on Sunday compelling me to give Him control and the impact of my decision to follow Him even when it seemed impossible.
Not only did the money for the $711 became available, gas money for us and Alex was available, money for miscellaneous items for the Family Fall Festival on Sunday were available, and today funds were available for a special breakfast treat plus as an added bonus God cleared the traffic and lights from Danville to Terre Haute! It was funny because Jeff kept repeating every couple of miles "Where has the traffic gone today?" We can't outgive God, I knew exactly where the traffic had gone and it was no coincidence.
As I look back on the week there was more. God was moving all around me so that I would know I am truly in His care, that He will care perfectly for the troubles in my heart. This week I struggled alot with family relationships. The brokenness we are experiencing really makes me sad and this sadness threatened to overwhelm me this week. I still don't have answers about where these relationships are going but I do know that God gave me two things as a result:
1. He reminded me of the Serenity Prayer.
The last six days have been a transformational culmination of the Spirit guiding me, speaking to my heart, asking me to change. This has been a process that began in July. I love when I grow in faith through obedience.
An obedient life with Christ is definitely an adventure and one which is full of growth opportunities, ever transforming. I love this life, but that doesn't always mean it's easy.
Back in July I realized I had moved in my daily relationship with Christ. I could see God using the daily devotion time with Cassie to draw me nearer to Him, then in August a spark fueled a fire when we followed God to visit Trader's Point Christian Church and the end of September daily devotion time with my husband was restored providing a wonderful time for us to share and grow together.
With each new encounter God has been moving in my heart.
Throughout all this growth, I knew I was holding onto a mess, a money mess. I kept having an uncomfortable feeling regarding our finances. I knew we were stretched too thin, we had too many obligations and I knew weren't tithing. I know this sounds very disobediently nuts, very sin-filled, you name it. Trust me I know! But still this is the truth of where I was and I didn't know where to begin to make changes. The mess seemed barely manageable with no room to give. I was holding on tight to a sinking ship. So I just lived with the voice of the Spirit reminding me of my disobedience and that I needed to change.
Not fun, but it's what I did.
Then six days ago, without knowing how disastrous our finances were about to become God spoke loud and clear.
We stayed home that Sunday to have Church as a family through the online streaming at Maryland Community Church. We have never done this, but it felt like that was where God wanted us that morning. It was a bit chaotic with grand-babies playing, technology malfunctions and breakfast.... but it was family, it was good and God was among us.
Honestly, with the atomosphere that was surrounding us, I didn't expect to receive any message that morning..... however, when God wants to speak to you, it really doesn't matter what's going on around you, somehow He takes center stage and He is all you will hear.
The message was on tithing. I wanted to pretend the sermon didn't hold a message for me. But the sermon went on and on until I heard. By the end I accepted God's invitation to turn the finances over to Him. I committed to the plan He laid before me.
My head knew this plan made no sense. This plan was not feasible nor possible from where I was sitting.
But my heart knew this was God's plan, He rarely works within the finite views of this world, and it was for God to sort out. This was for Him to manage, for me to follow and trust.
My head wanted to freak out, but instantaneously my heart's peace overruled! I do remember this whole exchange seemed bigger than I was understanding, but I was following Him and that's all I was holding onto.
Now to the days that followed. We experienced bizarre banking issues, one example is I overpaid Andie's lunch account by 3x the amount, I have never done this in four years! And there were more unexpected transactions that followed. By all rights our bank accounts should have been negative and absorbed 100's of dollars of fees. However, with God in control, He carefully orchestrated timing and dollars were always available for me to transfer. Nothing short of miraculous, we encountered no fees and I watched this week's banking with wide-eyed amazement.
Then came Thursday. We had a bill that absolutely had to be paid by 5pm Thursday or an even bigger mess would result. I thought the bill was $325. We tried all week to find a solution to help reduce the amount. I went to some quite extensive lengths trying to help God out. Then on Thursday when we couldn't find an alternative I called to verify the amount. OH NO!! The amount due is $711. Looks like God doesn't need our help after all, we needed His more than we knew!
If we didn't have the $325 then you can only imagine the impact of more than double that amount.
My eyes were immediately opened. I could see how God had moved three weeks ago knowing this day would come, I could see Him even more clearly through His message on Sunday compelling me to give Him control and the impact of my decision to follow Him even when it seemed impossible.
Not only did the money for the $711 became available, gas money for us and Alex was available, money for miscellaneous items for the Family Fall Festival on Sunday were available, and today funds were available for a special breakfast treat plus as an added bonus God cleared the traffic and lights from Danville to Terre Haute! It was funny because Jeff kept repeating every couple of miles "Where has the traffic gone today?" We can't outgive God, I knew exactly where the traffic had gone and it was no coincidence.
As I look back on the week there was more. God was moving all around me so that I would know I am truly in His care, that He will care perfectly for the troubles in my heart. This week I struggled alot with family relationships. The brokenness we are experiencing really makes me sad and this sadness threatened to overwhelm me this week. I still don't have answers about where these relationships are going but I do know that God gave me two things as a result:
1. He reminded me of the Serenity Prayer.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
God gently reminded me that not everything is always my fault. Everyone gets to make their own choices. Honestly, at the moment I don't feel that God is asking me to DO anything new regarding these relationships. What I have already done is all that I have been called to do right now. I am willing to do whatever He asks, and right now it is to wait. I must accept that today I cannot change this brokenness.
2. Once I came to the understanding above, He provided great encouragement and reassurance. For three weeks there has been no additional response to this Sunday's attendance at our familly event and then BOOM! Two families popped up with their RSVP. Thank you God!!! This transformed my heart!
I truly believe this entire week unfolded the way it did because of where God began working on me back in July and and because I took His hand each step of the way and followed.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for You declares the LORD, plans to prosper you, not to harm you, plans for hope and a future.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for You declares the LORD, plans to prosper you, not to harm you, plans for hope and a future.
Psalm 46:10 Be still and know that I am God.
I am sticking on these two verses today and living in a very awe-inspired, thankful place. I am growing in trust and faith. This is so good!
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Give Me Jesus
How is the best way to describe the experience of being human? I suppose the answer varies based upon how the day is going, what season of life you are in, or a whole host of many other variables.
If I were left on my own today, then today I would describe the experience of being human as the opportunity to be swallowed up by my own self-pity; overwhelming confusion brought on by the actions and decisions of those who choose to not have a relationship with me or most of the immediate family; to be human and without guidance I would crawl up on the couch, watch it rain and feel no joy.
Thankfully, I am not a human who is left to my own devices and understanding. I am a child of God and He doesn't leave me in these dark places too long.
Even though I did want to host & attend my personal pity party, I was also conflicted and trying to understand how I could host such a party when I knew the life Jesus lived and ultimately He died for us all. Jesus was mocked, insulted, beaten, falsely tried and then suffered crucifixion for each of us. But I'm stuck and I don't know how to move from this space, these emotions & thoughts.
Father, help me please. I can not do this on my own.
Then immediately on the radio I heard this song by Building 429
I am so thankful to be reminded that this is NOT where I belong. Take this world and all that it holds, Father, give me Jesus.
To sing the words of this song and mean them from the very bottom of your soul, is powerful. It is transforming. It puts everything in perspective!
Thank You Father, thank You! Through Christ I come. Amen.
Today is truly a reflection of Matthew 19:26 With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible..
Before crying out to God, I knew where my head and heart were. I could not see a way through, not on my own. But going before the throne and seeking Him, asking Him to transform my heart and my thoughts...
Well all I can say is in my own hands it would be impossible for me to move from where I was. But in the hands of God, not only is moving possible, it was instantaneous and complete.
I am beyond thankful. I am thankful for a God who can speak to me perfectly in any moment. I am thankful for the lyrics that God provided through Building 429. I am thankful for my relationship with Christ. This relationship is so vital to me surviving and thriving in this world. I would not be who I am today without Christ, without the Holy Spirit. I am blessed beyond what I deserve and because of this I want to extend the love of Christ to all those around me. Father, You know the current family dynamic. I have no answers. But Father, these broken relationships stand like a gaping open wound in our family. Father I commit each of us into Your hands for You to mold and to make and to move in and among us. Father grant us each Your guidance and Your compassion for one another that You would be glorified through each interaction. Father through Christ I come with open heart and mind. Father lead the way. Amen.
If I were left on my own today, then today I would describe the experience of being human as the opportunity to be swallowed up by my own self-pity; overwhelming confusion brought on by the actions and decisions of those who choose to not have a relationship with me or most of the immediate family; to be human and without guidance I would crawl up on the couch, watch it rain and feel no joy.
Thankfully, I am not a human who is left to my own devices and understanding. I am a child of God and He doesn't leave me in these dark places too long.
Even though I did want to host & attend my personal pity party, I was also conflicted and trying to understand how I could host such a party when I knew the life Jesus lived and ultimately He died for us all. Jesus was mocked, insulted, beaten, falsely tried and then suffered crucifixion for each of us. But I'm stuck and I don't know how to move from this space, these emotions & thoughts.
Father, help me please. I can not do this on my own.
Then immediately on the radio I heard this song by Building 429
I am so thankful to be reminded that this is NOT where I belong. Take this world and all that it holds, Father, give me Jesus.
To sing the words of this song and mean them from the very bottom of your soul, is powerful. It is transforming. It puts everything in perspective!
Thank You Father, thank You! Through Christ I come. Amen.
Today is truly a reflection of Matthew 19:26 With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible..
Before crying out to God, I knew where my head and heart were. I could not see a way through, not on my own. But going before the throne and seeking Him, asking Him to transform my heart and my thoughts...
Well all I can say is in my own hands it would be impossible for me to move from where I was. But in the hands of God, not only is moving possible, it was instantaneous and complete.
I am beyond thankful. I am thankful for a God who can speak to me perfectly in any moment. I am thankful for the lyrics that God provided through Building 429. I am thankful for my relationship with Christ. This relationship is so vital to me surviving and thriving in this world. I would not be who I am today without Christ, without the Holy Spirit. I am blessed beyond what I deserve and because of this I want to extend the love of Christ to all those around me. Father, You know the current family dynamic. I have no answers. But Father, these broken relationships stand like a gaping open wound in our family. Father I commit each of us into Your hands for You to mold and to make and to move in and among us. Father grant us each Your guidance and Your compassion for one another that You would be glorified through each interaction. Father through Christ I come with open heart and mind. Father lead the way. Amen.
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