Approaching the New Year

I have been praying and seeking the verse that would lead me into 2012.  I couldn't imagine what God would choose.  I couldn't imagine what would fit this crazy life we seem lead to be leading.  I'll be honest, last year's verse was so amazing and perfect that I was feeling a little disappointed, there just couldn't be anything more perfect..... Why do I think God can't continue to find perfection year after year or moment after moment??  Silly me.

 

Sitting on the side of the bed reading this morning's devotion, I read a verse I knew well, but with a fresh perspective I found  perfection to guide us into 2012.  I don't know if you have a verse that you are walking into the new year with, but since I shared last year, I wanted to carry on the tradition and share what God placed on my heart for this year.....

 

Ephesians 2:10   For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.  NIV

 

This verse God first placed in my path as we prepared for the Mexico Mission trip.  It grounded me in Him and I knew I was literally on a mission for Him.  It helped me to focus in times in of questions, doubt and fear, provided strength when the world was doubting and always gave me reason to sing praises and find adventure in Him each day.  It was an amazing eight or nine month period that become life changing as I walked with Him.

 

I find it interesting that this is the verse God has chosen to define the year ahead. 

 

For we are God’s handiwork  God created us!!!!  Each one of us..... ME, YOU..... whoever we run into!!!  All created uniquely by the very hands and in the image of God!!!! This alone gives us GREAT reason to sing praises every day, to drop in humble prayer asking how we can best be of service to each person we meet, and ultimately grow closer in our relationship to Christ. 

 

created in Christ Jesus Thankfully we have both accepted Jesus Christ as our personal Lord and Savior, we became a new creation yet again, at a wedding ceremony.  I believe that God is transforming us and growing us even now.  I see changes in you, in me and in us.  Recently I've been thinking about Old Testament marraiages and a reference that had been made about husbands serving at home for a year before returning to duties (wives were already at the home).  Though that's not practical in our lives for us to both take a year out and stay home, I have been very mindful of this Old Testament practice.  Mindful of our marriage transforming us into a new creation in Christ over the next year, mindful of God's presence and how he is at work, mindful of our time together and the growth opportunities that we face each day, week and month, mindful of our family.  I have become protective of us and our immediate family as a result.  I want to give our first year great focus as God moves in creating us.

 

to do good works We are called to do good works..... good works in our relationship with one another, in the lives of our children, friends, family and those placed in our path each day.  We are also human and will have bad days, fail miserably, fall short..... BUT we get to be there to pick each other up, support one other and hold each other accountable.  Learning to do this well is a communication we are growing in.  This will make us stronger together as well as individually.  

 

which God prepared in advance for us to do.  And yes, what ministry and mission each day holds, as well as the ministry and mission of our marriage and life together...... God planned and PREPARED in advance.  He prepared this before we arrived at this point, step by amazing step if we will seek Him and follow we can continue to find the treasures our lives holds, and I fully expect it to be glorious. 

 

I do believe this is the perfect verse for 2012.  I love you, I love our life..... I love being a follower of Jesus Christ and child of God..... He sent you to me.  I have trusted Him, allowed Him to teach me and followed where He lead me... He has orchestrated 2008, 2009, 2010.  2011 was no different except I got to share it with you and you got to live it with me!!!!  I can't wait for 2012!!!!! 

Dear Heavenly Father, Christ Jesus my personal Lord and Savior, and Holy Spirit my daily Guide..... I am thankful for this life you prepared for me and lead me in, I am thankful for my relationship with each of You. This life I live is overflowing and abundant.  I am unworthy and humbled and eager and excited to follow you into 2012.  I ask You to bless our marriage with Your loving presence, stir in the hearts of our children and draw them each closer in relationship with You.  I pray that You stir in the hearts of Jeff and I, I pray that You are the Potter and in Your hands we are the mold-able clay.   I pray we are ready when you call each day to serve those You place in path, I pray we seek You daily, grow in relationship with You and with one another.  Father in all things we say and do I pray You are glorified.  Amen.

Peace & Joy Restored

It is so very good to be a child of God!!!!  Insert <AMEN> right here!!

I was in the middle of a party that I didn't want to be at and I didn't know how to leave.  As a child of God we are armed with an arsenal of weapons that help us not only survive but THRIVE in this world.

And prayer is powerful my friend!  Combine prayer with your own willingness to be transformed and WATCH OUT!!

I wrote that last post, concluded with prayer and began to walk through life.  No it wasn't instantly differently, everything wasn't all of a sudden all better.

What happened immediately was I was aware of where I was, what I was in the middle of and WHO was trying to steal my peace and joy this season.

I continued to read my devotion.  I was more purposeful in my decision and prayer.  I attempted to slow the pace.  Yet everything still seems disconnected.  The dots were getting closer, yet still not connecting.

On Thursday morning last week I woke up and something felt different.  God was moving around me,  I could feel His presence.

During my morning devotion I heard God loud and clear with a message regarding me and this Christmas season..... "Stay ever close to Me, and you will not deviate from the path I have prepared for you.  That is the most efficient way to stay on track; it is also the most enjoyable way."

Then on the ride into work He speaks again.... the second devotion closes with these very words:   "there is still time to refocus and make room for Christ this Christmas, today!"

Doesn't get much more clear than that.  I knew it was a crossroads kind of day.  Stop fence dancing and focus!  God was giving me a choice:  "Focus solely on Christ or get lost this season in a sea of chaos."

Thankfully I found my focus on Christ Jesus, my Savior.  It is Good and Peace and Joy have been fully restored to my soul.  The bounce in my step is back, there's smile on face and hugs for all.

So now what?

Well everything is not peaches and cream.  Hiccups and road bumps are still experienced along the way.  Just as we are all uniquely created, we all have a different focus this holiday season.

Finding my focus in Christ was certainly the key for me in approaching these individual differences.

I want Christ to be the center of my world, the force that guides my decisions.  My anchor.  The reason I celebrate this season.  For me Christmas begins the Easter season and Easter is EVERYTHING.

I want my heart to be in the right place, not a self-righteous place.  I want Christ to be glorified.  I want my convictions, decisions, plans and celebrations to provide opportunities for Christ to be a part of the discussion.  I want my excitement and love of Christ to be infectious and to inspire those around me.

So when plans become disrupted or a change must occur it has been interesting to witness my own transformation this season as I have grown in Christ.

Early disruptions threw me into a tailspin.  I was wild, out-of-control, trying to please everyone and pleasing no one, I had no direction and no focus.

Now when we hit snafu, I have but one focus.  I must begin Easter at Church 6pm on 12/24/11 praising and worshipping the Christ Child.  We have plans to leave Terre Haute at 430 pm as long as the weather is clear, otherwise we'll leave a little earlier.  With our hearts in the right place and seeking Him, we've done all we can do, we simply must place the remainder in His hands and trust our night to Him.

That is the basis for making decisions this holiday season.  I ask Christ to bless our home, our family and our friends with the Love that Christ offers to each of us.  I pray they each feel His presence and seek Him this holiday.  I pray this Christmas a Savior, who was once born a baby would melt the heart of those who don't know You and lead the way to the cross this Easter.  I stand willing and ready for You to work through me to reach those You long to bring home.  Father, thank You for Jesus.  Amen

Satan is throwing a party..... BUT IT'S BABY JESUS' BIRTH DAY!!!

I can be so naive at times.  Aggravatingly so!  Yesterday and last night I was right there again.

Yesterday I was beginning to identify and sort out the details of chaos.  I thought I was on the way up out of the muck.  Not so much.

Last night after my first conversation I felt like a non-person.  Like I didn't exist, like I didn't matter.  I was kind of surprised to feel that way.  Weird.  Unsettling.

I walked through the evening feeling like I was a foreigner in strange lands.  It was bizarre.

Then another conversation ensued.  I escalated from nonexistent to a very existent FAILURE.

That was my breaking point.  S-N-A-P and the tears began to flow.  I couldn't continue any longer.  "Help me Jesus" were the only words I had.

Turns out they were good words.  I had read them just last week in my daily devotion.  It spoke of the battle we engage in every day and that we need Jesus but we need to ask for His help.  "Help me Jesus."

This thinking carried into the morning and I landed here:

Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Yes, I'm in the middle of a battle.  I had not prepared in advance for the fight.  And so surprise attacks carried more weight than normal, created more damage than necessary. 

I just stood there and it felt as though

plans were made for me
people talked about me
plans were made around me
people yelled at me
plans were made regardless of me
people accused me

To walk into those situations unarmed, is UNWISE..... yes, FOOLISH!!!!!  Yet this is exactly what I was doing.  I felt like a revolving door, spinning and spinning and spinning.

Thankfully, my prayer, "help me, Jesus" armed the One who could battle in my place.  Jesus stepping in for me allowed silence long enough for me to realize what is REALLY going on and how UNPREPARED I am.

Thank you Jesus!!!  In the silence I heard:

Ephesians 6:14-17  Be ready! Let the truth be like a belt around your waist, and let God's justice protect you like armor. Your desire to tell the good news about peace should be like shoes on your feet. Let your faith be like a shield, and you will be able to stop all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Let God's saving power be like a helmet, and for a sword use God's message that comes from the Spirit.

I won't say that I'm all better, but I will say I am in a better place, better frame of mind.... I stand poised with the armor of God, prepared for the battle that Satan has disguised in so many forms over this last week. 

Abba I realize Satan is trying to orchestrate a party in my life this holiday season..... but it is not what I choose to stand for.  This is a time to reflect on the birth of Christ Jesus, your Son, a baby, my Savior.  Father I give my holiday season to You, because I desire to glorify You and because I need you and because those around me need You.  Father in the coming weeks there are several events that I ask Your guiding hand to direct...... Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, Christmas with the Cook's, Tucker's, Wright's, Herald's and Shaffer's, the plans and decisions for Laura, Joseph, Katie, Alex and Andie, Jeff and I.  Father I ask that You move in all our hearts, give us wisdom as we make decisions, give us strength, courage and compassion to follow through as You lead us.  Father in all we do and everyone we meet may Christ be glorified and may we be humbled.  This Christmas Father move in a mighty and unmistakable way that we cannot ignore.  Father may your presence be with us and joy overflowing this holiday season as you continue to join our family.  May we all feel Your love in every moment we share. Abba, I love you ~ amen.

JOY is MIA! Seriously?

Luke 1:14  You will have great joy and gladness, and many will rejoice at his birth

I realized today I had gotten slightly off track this Christmas season.  Perhaps I was aware this was happening.  Good news though, I hadn't travelled so far that I had forgotten Christmas is truly about celebrating the birth of Christ, it just wasn't at the forefront of my.... ANYTHING!

Usually I live my life very dependently on Christ.  I seek Him and allow Him to lead me through each day, week, month and season.  Glorious.  And this year has been an amazing culmination of His work.  Even still I know as long as I am breathing, He has work to do in me & through me.

And since today I am breathing there are things for me to learn and ways He can work through me to reach those around me.  Somewhere in the day to day is where I must have gotten derailed... but first a bit of history.

Through the Holy Spirit, God Himself chose our wedding date (but that's another story).  God held off the weather in the northwest to allow us to fully experience Him at Mt Ranier.  He overwhelmed me to tears there at the peak.

Throughout this year God has moved and weaved within our family to bring us all together.  Our family is a beautiful.... Jeff and I are lovingly lead the way with God at our head.  We have been overwhelmingly blessed with four beautiful, talented and loving girls in Laura, Katie, Alex & Andie.  An amazing son-in-law Joseph and a hopeful son-in-law in David.  Andie & Katie shall remain our mysteries in love for now, though we have enjoyed Brandon at our gatherings.  And saving the youngest blessings for last with grandchildren in Knox, Lennex and Talulah!!!  A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!!!

Bringing us all together as lovingly as this family has unfolded could not have been done by Jeff nor I.  I graciously and thankfully concede that this was not my doing!  I would have made a mess of everything.  I know without question the work of my Father when I see it, I feel it.  His love is all around us.

I take such effort to say this all because, without question, our lives are the handiwork of our Father in Heaven.  However a life in Christ doesn't promise a life filled with roses and candy every day.  Even still I want to argue......

But Abba, it's Christmas..... why can't I?  Why don't?  Why doesn't?  I won't see <insert stomping feet> (ok, not really)

I recovered from all of that and began to focus on the blessings of family that God had provided.... my husband. 4 girls. sons. grandchildren. Oh yeah!

Then small uprisings began over Christmas Eve and maybe even Christmas morning.  Girls, extended family and more.  OH MY!?!?!??!  For whatever reason I was overwhelmed with emotion.  I felt angry, defeated, sad, frustrated.... 

WAIT!!!!  Houston, we have a serious problem.

None of the emotions just written are found in the verse above.  There is no great joy, no gladness.

I didn't know what to do in that moment.  But I knew I wasn't going to cave in to the feelings or speak in that moment.  I prayed all the way to church that evening.  "Jesus, help me."

Jesus, is LORD of my life.  During past Christmas seasons I have focused on how thankful I am.  I spend time in His presence.  Now I feel so out of balance that I can't find an ounce of joy and gladness in this glorious season that kicks off Easter?

Yes, I want to see family at Christmas, but in that time, whatever time I have and whoever I am with, wherever I am.... I want to celebrate that Christ my Savior is born.  I want Christ to lead me through this season.  In order for Him to lead, I must seek Him and follow.  I need balance to be restored and then whatever my needs are throughout this season, they will be met and flow from Him.

God ordained our wedding date and has perfectly orchestrated each relationship within our family.  He holds the plan for this holiday season.  I have no idea what it looks like and I don't need to.  I only need to completely trust Him with my life and agree to follow as I always have.

My prayer on the way to church was met with a worship song which perfectly lead me into a wonderful prayer:

Take my life and let it be
all for You and for Your glory
Take my life and let it be Yours....

I am thankful to serve a living God, a risen Savior.  I am thankful that the Holy Spirit is actively dwelling within me, speaking to me, guiding me, pursuing me to help keep me on the path that leads me to my Father.

I pray that with His guidance my great joy and gladness in this magnificent season will be restored.  I pray that all family and friends would see Christ in me this Christmas Season.  I want to shout from the rooftops and Go Tell It On the Mountain that Jesus Christ is Born!!!  I do believe I feel that great joy & gladness returning even as I type!  Praise God!!