The drama from the earlier posts continued last Saturday and escalated on Monday to an irrational and overwhelming level. I was confused, I was hurt, I had no idea what to do or how I could help make this situation better.
Most of the day I wondered how this situation got to this point. God walked me right through the original text message, the conversations that followed and the letter. How did I land in this new moment filled with such negative emotion by those considered family?
I'll be honest, I wondered why God let this happen. He started the ball rolling. Why?
Then I read a posting from my friend Tony's blog. Great post about Paul and Silas being thrown into jail for doing something good and while in jail singing God's praises. Their experience ends as God reveals himself in a mighty way and the jailer and his whole family accept a life in Christ.
This post REALLY got me to thinking!
Yes, God provided the original direction, the beginning steps and the letter.... but then what?
God remained right where I left Him. It was I who moved.
I got caught up in the busy-ness of work, life, family.... blah, blah, blah. I didn't stay focused on God.
There wasn't anything He necessarily needed me to do. I however needed to stay near Him.
There are lots of ways for God to reveal Himself in a mighty way throughout this situation. But until He does, I need to be near Him, singing His praises, trusting Him, allowing Him to prepare me for what is next!
I followed God into a situation where He was leading me. However, once I was filled with peace and had a sense of mission accomplished I failed to continue to depend on Him.
I know that sounds crazy. But it's what I did. And then I wondered where He was. I know, what was I thinking!
Obviously I wasn't.
But I am so thankful to serve an All-Mighty and All-Knowing God. Who knows me better than I know myself. I am also thankful to have surrounded myself with a fellowship of believers that God can use to reach me with His wake-up message.
Thank you Tony for your obedience to ask Amanda for a suggestion and for following through. God had a message for me.
God, I loved the 90 days of reading the New Testament all the way through. Once that ended I couldn't figure out a new direction. During that time of reading I was so connected to You and growing daily. Father I need that focus. Help me to know where to begin again. Through Christ I come and seek Your wisdom. Amen.
